In this 21st century filled with "WCW" (Women Crush Wednesday), "MCM"(Man Crush Monday), and the infamous word "bae", being in a relationship almost seems like a necessity! People are in relationships that they know are no good for them and wont benefit them simply because they feel that they should be!
The idea of love is beautiful; I personally love love, but because I want it the right way, I refuse to settle! So, while I am awaiting my special love story, I am going to bask in the glory of being SINGLE!
Contrary to Instagram quotes, Facebook relationship updates, and Twitter relationships re-tweets up to 1000, being single is not that bad! In fact, here are 9 reasons why you should be enjoying your single life!
- You have more time to focus on yourself!- A relationship is a full time job! You are either texting them, calling them, seeing them, or missing them! The operative word there is them! Their feelings become your feelings. Their worries become your worries. And their problems become your problems. Now, that is a beautiful gesture and that is how a relationship should be, but you're single! This is about YOU! Your feelings, your problems, your worries, and your time to focus on them all! If you feel like taking them to anyone, try God! Take this single time to get yourself together, in your entirety!
- You can make sure that what you are bringing to the table is actually worth enjoying!- Are you confident in your solidarity? Are you a good companion? Are you worth dating? Do you have trust issues? Do you know how to encourage someone? Are you romantic? Do you have relationship qualities? Figure that out now, while you're single. Develop the skills necessary to be in a relationship (encouragement, patience, effort, etc) so that when you do find the right one, you are ready.
- You save money!- No dates, no gifts, no gas to travel to visit! Relationships are not cheap. Although genuine love should not have to be displayed or proven through material things, an occasional 'I love you!' or 'I'm sorry!' present never gets old and can get expensive depending on who you are dating or how much you mess up. But....you are single, so all that money can be saved! Go buy that purse you've been staking for a while or those shoes that just went on sale! You've got a little extra to spare you single thing you!
- You can foster a sense of independence!- There is nothing worse than someone who does not know how to be single! If they are in a relationship, they are happy. If they are not in a relationship, they are desperately searching for one. If they just got out of one, they are prepping to be in another one. That is pathetic. It is vital to know how to be satisfied with just yourself, no one else, just you! You need to know how to function without a companion, how to be happy without a companion, how to live without a companion. If you can't stand to be alone with you, what makes you think somebody else can?
- You can have guilt-free fun!- You want to take a spur of the moment trip with friends? Do it! You want to go out and party every other night and dance till your feet hurt? Do it! You want to kiss a complete stranger? Do it...but be careful! You're single! You can do things that others can't, without getting into trouble with someone! You don't have to worry about asking permission, asking forgiveness (aside from God), or feel guilty about what you are doing! As long as no one gets hurt, you can do it!
- You don't have to always look good!- Being single means having to impress no one! So, if you want to let yourself go for a little while, you can! Put the remote in one hand, a slice of puzza in the other hand, a order if fries in your lap and just bum it! You can do this because you're not expecting company and don't need to look sexy right now! You won't be embarrassing anyone, because you only represent yourself! *DISCLAIMER: The lag in your looks could chase off a potential suitor, so keep the bum-couture to a slight minimum in public or only within the walls of your home, where you are safe!
- You get to be selfish, in a healthy way!- The phrase, "Because, I don't want to!", is totally acceptable in your single life! There is no obligation to anyone, any plans, anything! You can be as selective with your time as you would like, without giving an explanation! Now, don't blow off everyone, you never know who you could be passing up, but if you get that feeling that it's just not going anywhere, then keep your time, money, and effort to yourself!
- You can figure out exactly what you are looking for!- Abyone ever ask you what yore looking for in a mate and you completely draw a blank? Because honestly, you don't know? Well guess what, that's perfectly ok! Take this time off to figure it out! Make a list of qualities you look for in a relationship, watch some "chick flick", love stories like The Notebook with great guys, analyze old relationships-what went wrong, what you don't want to repeat, etc. (In the midst if reminiscing, don't text them! You'll only regret it later!) If you don't know what you are looking for, you'll never know if you've found it!
- YOU GET TO DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO!- This is YOUR single life! You literally do whatever you want, as long as it is not illegal or immoral preferably! You can even not take any of my advice! You are free to just LIVE!
So tell me, how are you feeling about that single life now? I hope much better! I hope you're energized! I hope your eager to embrace this time in your life, because it's where you're supposed to be!
I am 20 years old, been single ALL my life, give or take a few "talking relationships" and shoulda-coulda-wouldas, and guess what...I AM STILL HERE! I have a decent amount of money in my bank account, especially for a college student (Glory to God!), I have made some incredible memories, I have grown as an individual, I am figuring out where I want to go in life, and most importantly, I am inexplicably happy 95% of the time!
Do I sometimes feel a little tug on my heart when I see couples? Of course! Do I feel a hint of loneliness when my friends talk about making plans for the future with their boo's? Yes, sometimes! But that's normal; full fledged human, so i'm entitled to that! .
Being single does not mean that you have to despise love or feel left out of some big "Relationships Only" party, it just means that....that you're single! That's it! Don't over analyze it, just enjoy it.
Indulge in, whatever you want, because you're single and you can!
xo, BLT